Back Down

There was a Tea and a Candle Light Performance. Over 200 people when to the Candle Light Performance. The rehearsals for it light up my day, and gave me something to look forward to. It was the telling of the story of Fanny Hooe (my favorite part of the job) by all of us. I had such a fantastic rush of energy after the performance. The tea was as well attended as expected, but our guests loved it, and I had a ball talking for over an hour and a half.

After these events were over everything seemed odd and strangely fast. There were nights in Calumet, long lunch breaks, many nights at the restaurant, and quite a few drinks. I went to mass with J and swam across Fanny Hooe (two big accomplishments). I skipped stones, and tried to enjoy my friends and our little harbor as much as I could before leaving it for God knows how long. I then jumped straight into a two day Cermak twin over load as the Major was in town. Now I'm alone in my parents condo. I miss the other three more than I thought I would, but I also am enjoying some alone time. New York, don't worry, I'm coming.

The Last of Da Harbor

Yesterday was an amazing day. I slept in until 9:45, and then jumped on E to wake her up and headed to The Pines where we split a cinnamon roll and an omelet. Ahh, the best of both worlds! We then went for a hike around Horse Shoe Harbor. It was beautiful and tons of fun climbing on the rocks! From there we went to the Delaware Mine. I have mixed feelings about this attraction. It was amazing to have such freedom to explore a historic mine, but I'm glad I didn't force my parents to go to this one. The 100 stairs and the lack of tour guides would've bothered them. We then went swimming at the Great Sand Bay where there were white caps on the waves while we floated along on our rafts. We brought parasols and didn't miss a chance for a photo opp. We then convinced George to eat wings with us (it didn't take much) and hiked Stairway to Heaven with him. We were so hot then that we required ice cream and a dip in Fanny Hooe. Then, we were cold so we had a sauna. The light was out so we did it by flash light. The night ended with some euchre instruction followed by some jr high dance flash backs. Fun was had by all. It's hard to believe I only have 11 more days!

UP and DOWN

I'm back in da Harbor after going down state for a few days.  It was an interesting, dramatic, calming, chaotic, familiar, and nomadic trip.  I woke up next to several interesting beings (one of them being my parent's beagle, Lucy).  I faced the facts in Ypsi after eating pineapple and black olives on pizza, and napping with Harry Potter.  There were breaking moments, but I was still happy to be there under any circumstance.  I got drunk and went to Nectos and got more drunk, and learned a gay friend is a friend indeed, when you're in need.  I had a power networking session thanks to the Wifi in Cass Cafe, and met Ms. Mary at the DIA.  I saw Jackie do Shakespeare and lunched with a Shafer.  I surprised my mother and father, and was all business with Shawna, but the pizza, just won't leave my mind.  I'm still slightly crazy.  I've heard the broken hearted make the best New York actors.

Over Half Full

A lot has happened since I've tapped into blog land.  My parents came up for a visit, and I wowed them with Copper Harbor's charms.  They enjoyed chicken wing night, went on the sunset cruise to the light house, and got hear charming stories about my roommate's deer camp.  While they were surprised by the wide use of outhouses.  I think they enjoyed themselves very much, and they certainly fed me well.  Although, they were alarmed that the ice cream stand owners know my name.

I'm in the swing of working at the restaurant in town.  The extra money is nice, but it is challenging to work with Uppers.  Sometimes I don't understand what they are saying.  For example, did you know that to 'Muck' something means to eat it?

We had the future historians at the fort today, so the day passed by extra quickly.  I had many more people to gossip with and play fox and geese with.  I have been unsure of my future as of late.  It's down to the age old question: Detroit or New York?  Whatever I chose I know I'll make it work, as I always do.

One Wild Ride

Today is my first day off in a while.  I love my job a great deal, but I'm happy for the rest.  Yesterday I had several 10-17 year old following me around at work, in costume.  They are part of a program called "Future Historians" and are very enjoyable.  Some are enthusiastic and others seem to have been dumped here by their parents.  It does seem odd to send a bunch of minors to observe me and my ways, but I'm sure stranger things have happened.

I have hiked the stairway to heaven twice since I last blogged, once alone and once with E.  I think I shall attempt it again today, but this time I will be armed with a camera.  Yes Mom (if you're reading) I am taking lots of pictures, and I will never forget this wonderful experience.  

I have also gotten an extra job since last week.  I'm a prep cook at a resturant in town.  Sadly, I don't think I'm really needed all that much.  I constantly feel as if I'm just getting in the cook's way, but if they want to pay me $8 and hr for standing around I'm all for it.  After all, it's better than spending $8, as Jeremy says.

I have also become addicted to Skype.  Yes, yes, it's true, I've discovered that I can actually see Mr. D's face, and I've never turned back.  I'm still not sure what the future will hold, but I do know it will be one wild ride.

Which Way's the Right One?

I had a lovely night of wings where I met L and was very happy to see she was everything I dreamt of and more.  I certain approve of G's taste.  After the wings and some hanging out time J and I headed home with my car full of groceries from a Walmart shopping trip (I know I shop at the devil's store, but I'm a poor artist).  We were in deep conversation about our boyfriends (our favorite topic) when we saw the bridge that connects Hancock and Houghten.  It took us several minutes to realize that we had been going the wrong way for a half hour.  When we finally turned around J insisted on called G who claimed he loved us even though we are flighty.

I blame Mr. D for all of this.  If I weren't so taken with him and if he didn't consume most of my thoughts I might have taken 41 in the correct direction, but I must say J and I did have a wonderful conversation.  I don't know what direction I'm going these days.  I'm not sure if I'm New York or Detroit bound, but I do know I must do what I love, and I must be with those I love.  I don't think they are mutually exclusive, but then I'm a flighty girl.

So Much So Little So 1870

Yes faithful Blog readers (if you're out there).  It seems as if everything is moving along as usual at our little fort.  That is to say I seem to be learning a new Civil War song every week and have developed more material for my performances, many chicken wings have been had at the Calumet golf course, and I'm even better at cooking in my microwave.  I have found a new friend in the mountain know as Brockway, and several locals scratch their heads at my frequent "cell phoning" at it's peak.  The fourth of July was crazy here.  I mean, people actually came to the harbor.  It was one big party out here, and the tourist came to the fort in swarms.  I got to march in the 4th of July Parade, and lost the hoop in my skirt in the middle of the route.  It's finally hot in the harbor, and I'm not happy about sweating through my many layers, but it only takes one little child to be frightened by my telling of the story of Fanny Hooe or one adult who giggles about my "courting stories" or who lies and says that I have a wonderful singing voice to make it all worth while.  In an odd way I feel as if I'm applying everything I ever learned.  Who would have though I would feel fulfilled working at a historic fort?

Old Friends and New!

Hello Blog readers!  I'm sorry for the delay in posts.  It seems my existence here in da Harbor is a little more demanding than I thought.  I love my job at the fort and everyday I try to add some new material to my performance.  I learned quite a few Civil War songs, now it's on to more tall tales from 1870.  I also have written a script for some evening tours, and I must say I'm quite pleased with it (didn't I say I was going to write in Copper Harbor?).

Mr D came and visited me, and of course he took up my attention as he always does.  He seems full of kindness and love, and I felt blessed to spend some time with him.  Though we are facing some complications, it's always good to know that you have a trusted companion who knows your faults and loves you anyway.

My roommate and I have quite the system for chores around the sauna in which we live.  We alternate doing laundry once a week and plan out our meals together so that we can grocery shop and split the costs.  Yes, that's right I have been planning what I eat more than a week a head of time.  I have never been so organized in my life.  E certainly has made a new woman of me.  Of course, I've had my effects on her as well.  I have her on an exercise regiment.  Of course we always reward ourselves with ice cream so I'm not certain how useful it really is!

In short I miss my friends and family everywhere else and wish they would come and visit, but, like always, my friends here are becoming so close and dear to me, I can hardly imagine a different existence.

Tea with Mrs Muller

Yes ladies and gentlemen the moment you have waited for has finally arrived.  I have started my job as the Second Lieutenant's wife at Fort Wilkins in Copper Harbor Michigan.  I spent a week intensely studying material with my co-workers.  I can't say I'm an expert on the Civil War or even Ft Wilkins at this point, but I'm learning.

Yesterday was my first day to entertain guests in my parlor.  The entire experience was amazing.  I get to wear an amazing costume (pictures coming soon) complete with parasol and purse accessories.  I then chat with guests, knit, promenade, and explain what certain artifacts were used for.  I can't believe they are paying me to do this.  Hell, I've been doing this sort of thing in my backyard since I was 5.  They really want me to work in some Shakespeare.  I dignified lady like myself would be familiar with it, but I can't seem to figure out how to do that just yet, perhaps with some time.

I have also been exploring the area quite a bit.  I've been to Hunter's Point and Horse Shoe Harbor.  I've been swimming in Lake Fanny Hoe, and bike ridding all over the Harbor.  Oh, and I can't forget Brockway Mountain that not only supplies me with a wonderful view, but also is the closest point to get cell phone reception.  Yes, that's right, no cell phones.

I've also become quite creative cooking meals in the microwave and on a hot plate.  My friends have become fans of my tacos, and when all else fails Lynn, my land lady, invites us to dinner.  I am having a blast here in the Harbor besides the fact that I am missing several Detrioters and New Yorkers.  Hopefully some of you will make it to the top of the world soon.

In Da Harbor

Jeremy and I departed from Detroit on Friday morning after jam packing my mother's Ford Focus with as many possessions as possible, and filling up on far too much caffeine.  Everything was going wonderfully, we crossed the bridge and were making excellent time, chatting and singing to the radio the whole time.  At a certain point we disagreed about the lyrics to a certain song.  We listened intently to the radio to hear who was correct when out of no where a large demon bird (some say it was a turkey vulture, but it could not have been a real animal) swooped in straight towards my windshield.  Apparently the demon bird was on a suicide mission.  Jeremy swerved while I went into the fetal position.  The demon bird left my right mirror hanging on the side of my vehicle.  We tossed into the passenger window, and stuffed a pillow in the open gap of the widow as we drove through a down pour.  

We made it to a gas station where a mechanic took off the mirror, and made it back on the road.  Needless to say Jeremy didn't drive the rest of the way.  After getting lost, asking direction at a creepy hotel, getting a speeding ticket, and admiring odd billboards for fudge, we finally got to Marquette.  I dropped Jeremy off at his boyfriend's house, and began driving the longest three hours of my life.  As I drove I called George over and over, who kept assuring me that I hadn't hit Houghten yet and had certain not gotten close to Calumet.  At a certain point it was decided that I would crash with him for the night.  Perhaps it was the crazy sound in my voice, or my terrible driving record, but regardless I'm glad I stopped driving.  I don't think I would've made it.  After a few beers, George and I realized that we were locked into his apartment.  This was odd because neither of us had locked the door.  According to George's dad his place is haunted.  We called our boss to come and get us out.  He failed at turning the knob, and broke George's key in the lock after we tossed it down to him through the window.  Finally, George's dad came and opened up an alternate exit, leaving us with a spare key.  

After such an exciting day, it was good to unpack yesterday in my tiny sauna room, and wander around the "town" of Copper Harbor.  It is one of the most beautiful place I have ever been.  It is also the most desolate.  I am looking forward to starting work at the fort, and having more adventures to share.

For the First Time I Feel.... Wicked

In the latest breaking news, my hair is green. No, I haven't suddenly decided to embrace my inner punk (I'm sure she's hiding deep down somewhere). I simply took a dip in a hot tub with Mr. D. I never thought I would see the day. You see, Mr. D. is a kind, considerate, and "very appropriate" Christian young man. I was shocked that he would even consider jumping into a tub of warm liquid with a scantly clad Cermak, alone, late at night. There was a serious debate between the hot tub and getting some ice cream, but I kept insisting that I wasn't hungry at all. Needless to say we had a fun, yet "very appropriate" time in the hot tub (which is actually in the apartment complex that my sister lives in. She was luckily out of town). It wasn't until much later in the evening that Mr. D. noticed that the ends of my hair were green. "Oh", I said, " It will probably come out with shampoo". Three washes later it has not come out. I am beginning to think that it might actually might be God's punishment for seducing a perfectly nice young man into a hot tub. I called my salon and they suggested that I wash my hair in tomato paste. It better work! I learned my lesson God just take the green away!

The Same Ol' Fried Goodness

The time will come when you realize that you have gotten older, that you are sincerely changed, perhaps for better, but never the less changed forever. You are no longer your carefree young self. For me this realization came last night, the form of onion rings.

Now, I have not exactly been the pillar of health these last few months, many of you will remember my brush with death. But, I saw that as an isolated instance. Something that I would recover from and leap directly back into my youth. Needless to say I have been taking good care of myself. This includes and extended stay at my parents condo, plenty of yoga, and eating fairly well.

As I sat in Cass Cafe with Mr. D. I thought nothing of ordering their famous lentil burger and onion rings. Hell, I remember eating "The Love Basket" (consisting of only fries and onion rings) for dinner several nights after WSU shows. It was not long after I gobbled the greasy food that I had an upset stomach. We took a long walk to the Fisher building, and then sipped on Ice Tea, but the issue only got worse. I found myself in a CVS parking lot in the middle of Detroit with D running in to get me medicine. I knew he had to get home, but just like the good old days, his main concern was that I was okay (a novelty I must admit I took for granted as a teen). Once I successfully convinced him that I could make the journey to Shelby Township without his assistance we parted ways. Though, he was rather reluctant to let me drive myself.

I jumped on I 94 and with minutes, I was pulled over to the side of the highway vomiting with great conviction. Stupid onion rings! It was at that moment that I realized that I hadn't really eaten fries since February, and that this could possibly be the cause of my body's rebellion. For a moment I morned for the loss of my iron stomach, but that was only a brief distraction to the joy that I experienced at Mr. D's continued loyalty. Whatever happens it's nice to know that true, sincere love won't betray you the same way your digestive system will.

I've been able to spend a lot of time in Detroit over the past few days. WSU's campus seems so tiny compared to what I remember. Maybe it's the fact that I've gotten use to walking almost everywhere, or that when I'm in NYC I tend to roam everywhere from Washington Heights to Midtown to Queens in a single day, whereas at Wayne, I stayed to a small area.

Whatever the reason, I enjoyed my new feeling of the WSU turf being quaint and small, a little community of it's own. I enjoyed leisurely walking down the streets, stopping when I felt like it, not in a rush to rehearsal or class. Parked my car by the Hilberry and walked to Eastern Market (which seemed shockingly close). I ate at Sala Thai, which still seems delicious even after practically living on NYC thai.

I noticed details on buildings and appreciated the lush grass on all the University property more than I had before. It was as if I was in the last act of Our Town. I never really saw or appreciated everything around me on the campus until I went away.

So Much to Do, So Little Time

I remember spending a week or two at my parents place during the summer of undergrad, and the time moving by so slowly. I got bored so easily and would often fall subject to the temptations of day time television.

Now it seems like there isn't enough time in the day. Perhaps its because I'm more conscious of fitting in a good work out into my day, the large pile of reading that I have to get through for my summer job, or the fact that everyone want to see me (go away for a few years and have a near death experience and people will be flocking to you).

I also find that I enjoy my parents more, I mean really enjoy them. I don't just meet up with my dad for a free lunch or drive my mom to work for the car. I've been attempting to spend some quality time with them. Luckily, my father is a history buff so my Civil War reading assignment are of great interest to him. My mom is trying to get into shape so I've been taking evening walks with her. Which is better than going out in the day, since a Victorian Lady never tans. As I look down at my golden skin I realize, I may be screwed.

New York to Detroit to The Big Woods

I caught part of Magenta Giraffe's plays reading the other day, and was pleasantly surprised by the quality of it and the amount of people that showed up with educated feedback. Tons of old college friends were there and here they are, in the middle of a city with one of the nations worst economies, thriving, and making theatre happen. I have been a part of many new theatre companies in New York. All of them seemed disorganized and unfocused, or else, unwilling to get a start compared to Magenta Giraffe. As I settled into a seat at a table in the back of Cass Cafe. The conversation centered around being able to exist anywhere that there is a theatre scene. It made me wonder if New York was just an over priced way of running away. Of course, if it weren't for New York, I wouldn't be the same person you see before you. As I begin peeling away the pages of research for my new adventure, I am happy know that the experiences I have this summer will further shape my experience, even if that experience is with a population of 75.

Busy Little Bee

The last few days have been filled with bonfires, deep dish pizzas, extreme yoga classes, and thank-you note writing. As I stare at the stack of material on the history of Fort Wilkins, I wish my high school AP history teacher was still in my life. I even had a dream about him last night. I have been running through scales trying to teach myself the recorder, and today's task is to get some knitting done. I have a pretty intense itinerary for someone who "has nothing to do" or is "taking it easy". I guess it's just not in my nature to be bored. My mother use to press me as a child to "do something productive". But as I sat gulping down pizza in Ferndale, burning my mouth as I caught up to an old high school friend. I realize it is simply my passion for life that drives me. I am already coming up with things to keep me busy in the UP. By the way, if anyone is reading this, I'd love some book recommendations.

Things Remembered

Does absence make the heart grow fonder, or does the heart simply change when it's away? I drove out of my way yesterday to go to a local audition in Michigan. I got lost on the way, and ended up showing up late, a thing I would never do a NYC audition. It all seemed like such a big pain in the butt, as if I needed to do this to keep myself occupied, and not to book a gig. But, when I entered the small theatre in Ann Arbor, and was greeted so warmly by the auditors, I felt alive. I performed my monologues as if I was having the time of my life, and in fact I was. Perhaps it was the two weeks away from auditioning or classes, or the fact that I am back home, but I honestly enjoyed myself. It was almost enough to make me want to move back to the midwest. I mean, I truly haven't had that much fun at an east coast audition in a long time.

I then met up with an ex-boyfriend strike that THE EX-BOYFRIEND, the first one, the one I hold the other ones up to, the one I use in acting class, and the one I felt deepest for and was most hurt over. I should've been nervous, but I was just excited to see him. It's been over five years. As we talked of what we have been up to and how far we've come, we laughed and ate. It occurred to me that we had never had this much fun while we were dating. Perhaps it was because we've both mellowed out, or because there was no longer the pressure of a relationship on us. Whatever the reason I had a wonderful day. A day that reminded me to always have a party no matted what the situation, and forced me to face the fact that I need to chill out a little. It's important for me to work hard, but in order for my work or my relationships to be great. I need to let go a little.

Getting Back in the Swing of Things

This weekend I indulged a little. I sadly, did not make it to church on Sunday, as my night of dancing and "celebrating" with my sisters and friends wore me completely out. It seemed like a good time was had by all at Delux, though the staff was rather rude at the Anthenum hotel, and we almost didn't make it due to a long over due venting session between the Cermak sisters. After such a wild weekend, I was happy to sleep in today, and to weasel my way into a free week membership at a local gym where I swam to my heart's content. I then scoped the Internet for local acting opportunities, and worked on my pieces for an audition in Ann Arbor tomorrow. All in all the day was rather close to a day off in New York. I only hope I continue to enjoy myself as much in the upcoming weeks.

The Life of the Party

Last night I had the pleasure of listening to Kono Michi in the beautiful Rivera court with my two dear friends. It's funny, I've been to the DIA millions of times, but it took a bit of distance for me to truly appreciate it. As the sunset the sky light darkened and we were surrounded by unique and deep music. I sat back and for perhaps the first time I fully knew that I was blessed with wonderful friends in college. They are true gifts. While I always appreciated Detroit, it was like meeting an old lover again. As we sipped on saki and beer, we slowed moved our way through Detroit, getting to know her again, as she wooed us.

It's All in the Family

My grandma is in town. She is a very feisty lady. A tall woman for her era, standing at about 5'8", when she shuffles into a room, she definitely make an impression. People say that I'm like her and I'm glad. I hope I have as much spunk when I'm 89.

She came into town on a bus that takes seniors from Cleveland to Detroit to gamble at Greektown Casino. She makes this trip often, and enjoys gambling. Don't get me wrong, my Grandmother does not play craps or blackjack. You won't hear her yelling around a crowded table. She love the penny slots. She will tell you stories about big wins when she fronted just a few cents. I'm guessing we wouldn't have been able to pry her away from the machines, except for the fact that my sister is graduating from nursing school.

Yesterday my family and I sat in an auditorium and watched Shawna's two years of hard work pay off. We had to be extra supportive because Shawna's twin, Danielle was stuck in Colorado. In fact, she had been traveling all day. After a lovely diner and long hours of chatting Danielle came through the door I've never seen Shawna so happy. For a moment we were so peaceful so full of love. My sister's have accomplished a lot in the recent weeks. Shawna has graduated. Danielle was promoted to Major rank in the air force, and received a military award. As the entire family was glowing around them I felt a little self conscious. I've been spending so much time trying to take care of myself the last few weeks that I haven't been able to accomplish much. Suddenly my grandma chimed in with "and we're so happy you're alive!" (hilarious).

But, you know something, she's right. I'm pretty damn lucky I'm alive. Strike that, I'm pretty blessed I'm alive. Then, my god mother leaned over and said "my God, Jessie, you have your Dad's laugh". I don't think it was intended to be a complement, but I sure took it as one. Today I'm going to play the penny slots with Grandma Cermak at Greektown. To make up for the fact that she didn't get to gamble much yesterday. I'd say life is pretty good.

But Seriously

D: "what in the world are you doing in that horrible place"

Me: "this is where I'm from"

D: "oh..."

This is the phone conversation that started my day yesterday. Yes, it is true that Michigan isn't the most desirable place to live. I wouldn't exactly call Detroit a vacation spot or Shelby Township a place to party. But, I did spend the first 22 years of my life in this general area, and it's got to be a part of me somewhere.

As I sat in a coffee shop in Royal Oak, waiting for my friend, Lauren. I thought about how empty the whole town seemed. When I was in high school this area was the cool area to hang out, and looking around it seemed a little drab to me. This could have been the fact that I was comparing it to the "great" New York City, or the fact that Michigan as a whole has been experiencing economic downturn.

All of this was a little depressing for me until Lauren bounced into the shop. After a long embarrass she talked nonstop about plans she has and auditions she's going on. I was so proud of her. By all accounts she is a working actor (with a day job on the side), and she seems fairly happy. I asked her if she thought I had changed she said I seemed more sophisticated (which is hilarious), but that she was bring the old Jessica out. I believe my mom used the word cynical. Well, what ever I've become, while living in New York, this time at home is causing to soften and calm. It may be even as simple as not taking myself so seriously.

Domesticated Jess

It feels good to be home. In the past when I've come to my parent's condo for a break or holiday, I've felt an uneasiness. It's as if I'm leaving something behind. I believe it's a similar feeling to the one my mother must've had all of the times she left me in the grocery store.

After eating at the soup and salad bar at Big Boy with my dad, I went home, and cooked a squash and made a salad. Both were intended to be consumed later in the week. My mom had given me these tasks to ensure that I wouldn't get bored while she was at work. I have always enjoyed cooking, but there was something about yesterday that was simpler than it had ever been before. I could actually focus on what I was doing in the moment with worried about something happening 12 hours away.

In the evening I had a cup of coffee with my sister and her new boyfriend. I was the first family member to meet him. It was comforting to know that my sister trusted my opinion, and I truly enjoyed myself. I got up this morning and did some yoga. I feel peaceful.

The Last of the New York Times

Hello Friends and Strangers,

I have started this blog because I promised myself that I would write this summer. I am a New York based actor who is making the journey "home" to Detroit before making the long journey to Copper Harbor in the Upper Penisula of Michigan, where I will be playing the General's Wife at a historical fort. An odd way to spend the summer I will admit, but anyone who knows me well will tell you that I never quite do things the normal way.

So, what does a hip youngish artist do in the big city before she leaves civilization as she knows it? Did I go to a bunch of trendy clubs or have one last fling with old loves? No, my activity for the last few days has included much more interesting activities. I read children's plays at a local public school. I met Italian men who shared McDonald's fries with me. I ate comfort food and drank wine sitting on my floor with all my friends. I went to a poetry reading and talked too loudly in Barnes and Nobles with lovely ladies, and had a spiritual conversation with a cab driver. An odd farewell no doubt.

All of my friends are happy that I'm taking a job in the woods. Most of them feel that I need to take better care of myself, that I need a rest. My mother and father weren't sure about my decision at first they wondered why I would leave a city with so many opportunities to go sit in the middle of no where. Just the other day my mom said "this summer is about saving money". I won't lie. That is part of it. It will be nice to not pay New York City rent for a few months. But, it is also something deeper, something more important to me. I am young and I am an actor and I must not put down roots just yet, or get too comfortable anywhere. I want to be open to adventure, and adventure is just what I will get.

But first, a quick trip "home". I sit in the airport and wait to go back to the city I went to school in and the condo where my parents live. All three of the Cermak sister will be together once again . Who knows what will happen?